Really, What is the Big Deal?

On the way to work I listen to NPR. On Wednesday morning I listened to the aftermath of Tuesday’s election and ranted all the way to work when I learned that the voters in Maine repealed their law that allowed gay couples in that state to get married.

“What is the big deal?” I asked the inside of my windshield. Can anyone out there on the Internet answer this question? I am having trouble understanding why this is such a heated issue. Am I missing something?

The last time I checked, we live in America. America, also known as the land of the free and the home of the brave—you know, that part at the very end of our national anthem? Why, in the year 2009, is this such a big deal?

What’s the worst that would happen if gay couples were allowed to marry in every state of this nation? Is gay marriage a threat to national security? Will gay marriage change my marriage, or my life? Will it cause the sun to rise in the west if legalized? Will it rain dog shit if gay people can marry? Will chickens lay hard boiled eggs?

The way I see it, only good could come out of gay marriage. More people would be allowed to share every bit of their lives with their best friend. More people could build a family without judgment from anyone else—in a time when families in our nation are falling apart.

Again I ask, will someone please tell me what the big deal is?

Give me one good reason.

I dare you.

Unemployed in Rhode Island? Listen Up

Recently a friend of mine posted a job opening on the local job web sites. The other day he frustratedly showed me the resumes he received in response. Let me just say I am shocked at the lack of effort these job seekers have put into their resumes and cover letters that they sent. The unemployment rate in Rhode Island has reached something like 9-10% , the second highest rate in the US.

Understandably my friend was flooded with resumes. There are more candidates than jobs right now, and the competition for employment is very stiff. This means that job seekers should be playing on their A game right now. Right? Not from what I saw in my friend’s inbox.

When my friend showed me the resumes he’d received, I sat there with my mouth hanging open. I lost count of how many cover letters didn’t even bother to acknowledge my friend in a greeting. There was no “Dear Mr. Smith” or “Dear John,” or even “Dear Hiring Manager” greeting at the top of the email, despite the fact that his name was in the ad in the form of “Send your resume to John Smith.”

I was stunned to see how many cover letter that started with “I seen your ad on thislocaljobsite.com.” I seen your ad. Or worse yet, “I seen your add.” What?

Then there were the blatant misspellings. The “I spetiolize in Microsoft Office…” instead of “I specialize in…” The “I complited my program at the University…” instead of “I completed my program…” Well, if you were so damn good at Microsoft Office, perhaps you would have known that there was a spell check feature in Microsoft Word, right?

In response to an ad for a Computer Technician position, a candidate reported that he can “do computers good.” Well, that’s nice. Let’s try doing English now, shall we?

And what happened to citing the job description in the cover letter? For example, “I see that you are looking for a marketing specialist. I have 5 years experience in marketing and public relations…” No, instead he got a lot of "I seen your ad, here's my resume" emails. Delete! Delete! Delete!

I have had my share of employment dry spells, and in those times I have composed hundreds of cover letters. In my last bout of unemployment I averaged at least 1-2 interviews per week, and I sent out 1-3 cover letters and resumes per day. Each cover letter was written specifically for each job, and I spent hours painstakingly composing, proofing and editing each one. I will now share with you all what I have learned.

1. Use spell check. Then use it again. Then when you’re done with that read your cover letter to yourself out loud to make sure that it makes sense.

2. If you lack confidence in your writing skills, ask a friend or family member to help you proof read your cover letter and resume. What’s more embarrassing? Having to ask for help or sending a cover letter riddled with spelling errors, typos and nonsensical sentences?

3. Learn the name of the hiring manager and use it. For example “Dear Mr. Smith” or “Dear Ms. Jones.” If you are unclear about the spelling of the hiring manager’s name, try looking it up on the company’s web site, or call the company to ask an employee how to spell it. If none of that helps, either address it to “Dear Hiring Manager” or “Dear Sir or Madam.” Also, pay close attention to how they spell their name. I once made a dumb mistake of addressing an email to “Teresa” while the hiring manager’s name was “Theresa.” On the phone she asked me “Would you say you have a good eye for details?” Of course I answered yes, and she said “Then if you are good with details, you probably already know that you spelled my name wrong.” D’oh! Bye bye job interview!

4. The hiring manager wants to know in the cover letter how you will meet their needs. Read the ad. Then take the required skills from the ad that you know how to do and write in your cover letter that you know how to do them. For example, if the ad says that they want someone who knows how to write a press release, and you know how to do that, say so in your cover letter. “In my past position at Such and Such, Inc. I have composed numerous press releases and other marketing materials…”

5. Do not assume the gender of the person you’re sending it too. I once made the dumbass mistake of assuming that Lee Smith was a man, so I addressed it to “Mr. Smith." Wouldn’t you know it? Lee Smith was a woman. And she probably threw my resume straight into the trash. If I couldn’t be bothered to do a little research on Lee Smith, then I probably wouldn’t do a good job, right? I remember at my internship in college my boss, a VP at a public relations firm, was a woman. She routinely received resumes addressed to “Mr. Johnson” even though she was “Ms. Johnson.” She didn’t bother to read those resumes, and they went straight into the trash.

6. Be polite in your cover letter. The words “please” and “thank you” will go a long way. For example “Please feel free to contact me at your earliest convenience to discuss the position and my credentials…” or “Thank you for your consideration, I look forward to hearing from you.” Don’t say “Call me on my cell to schedule an interview…” You’re in no position to command the hiring manager to do anything. You are, however, in the position to ask the hiring manager to call as their busy schedule allows.

7. When attaching your resume, name it something like “Resume of Your Name.” My friend had received attached resumes that were named “Document.rtf” Not only does this file name not label what’s in the document; it makes it look like you are sending the hiring manager a poorly executed email virus. Help the hiring manager keep your resume straight from all the other ones he/she is getting by using your name as the file name. I’ve used my name and the position as the file name “Jane Smith-Marketing Specialist” as well. (This file naming method also adds a level of subliminal advertising. Maybe the hiring manager will get used to seeing my name with the position by seeing written that way.)

8. Keep a log of where you have sent your resume, which employers have called you back, and which ones you’ve visited for interviews. Keep track of dates, the names of the people you’ve spoken to, and what you spoke about. Print out the ads and job descriptions for the positions that you have applied to, and keep them in a folder. When the hiring manager calls you back you will need to have the job description in front of you so you can speak intelligently about the job and why you are qualified for it. In this market you need to sound like you are prepared at all times.

These tips might not land you the job, but I can guarantee that they will help keep your resume out of the trash can. If you can stay out of the trash can you just might get the interview, which is your biggest chance to impress the hiring manager. But first, you have to impress them with your cover letter and resume.

I’ve Never Been All that Big on St. Patrick’s Day

OK, to be honest, I am a St. Patrick’s Day grinch. I am not wearing green today, nor have I ever worn green on St. Patrick’s Day. I’ve never really understood the point of wearing green, drinking green beer or, gah, eating green bagels. I’ve never eaten corned beef, and actually have no idea what it is.

My St. Patty’s Day grinchiness began when I was a child. I hated the color green when I was a little kid. I didn’t own a single green article of clothing that I recall. Actually, I am sure I had green clothing, but I know that I have refused to wear them. I didn’t grow up in a house the celebrated St. Patrick’s day—I am Polish, and my parents didn’t go in for the whole “Irish for a day” thing that so many others do. In my house, it was all Polish all the time. (Insert Polish jokes here.) Celebrating St. Patrick’s day (or Halloween for that matter) was not the custom my parents were raised with in Poland, and were not the customs that they raised their children with.

I remember my first irritation with St. Patrick’s Day. I was in Pre-K at Warehouse Point School; I was five years old. We had gym that day, and my class was all lined up for some sort of activity. The gym teacher went down the line of Pre-Kers and gave a sticker to everyone who was wearing green that day. Of course, I had no idea what St. Patrick’s Day was, I had no idea that I was supposed to wear green on this day—not that I would have worn it anyway as I hated green.

I looked at the stickers stuck to the green shirts of my classmates, and instantly felt left out. I think that only me and one other kid—maybe it was the weird boy who insisted on wearing his jacket all the time and was notorious for having his sneakers on the wrong feet—didn’t have a sticker because we both weren’t in green. What a crappy thing for a teacher to do!

My dislike for St. Patrick’s Day extended into my teen years. My first non-babysitting job was in the bakery department of a local supermarket. The shipment of green bagels came in a day before St. Patrick’s Day. Green. Bagels. Is it just me, or should bread products never ever EVER be dyed green? Ever the dutiful bakery employee, I put the bagels in a basket and set them on top of the case, I think there were maybe 8 of them in there. I made a little sign that said something to the effect of “Yay! Green bagels! Get into the St. Patrick’s Day spirit!” (Worded a bit better than that, but you get the idea.)

Not one of those bagels sold. The day after St. Patrick’s Day I marked them down and put them on the “day old” shelf. Then another day after that they were tossed into the trash. All 8 of them.

So here it is another St. Patrick’s Day. I am wearing a grey sweatshirt. And I am still wondering what the big deal is about St. Patrick’s Day. I’ve never worn green on St. Patrick’s Day. I’ve never been inclined to kiss someone because they’re Irish because their T-shirt commanded me to. I’ve never been to a bar on St. Patrick’s Day, and I like my beer amber colored, never green.

Color me grinchy.

It's All About Demand

I’ve been thinking about the whole thing about having to provide my driver’s license to buy Sudafed. The more I think about it, the more it bothers me.

When I was in college I took this very interesting class called Drugs Across Cultures. This class was fascinating in that each lecture was about a different drug and how the production and consumption of each drug affected the economy and the culture of where the drug was produced and where it was consumed. Inevitably a culture forms around the purchase and use of the drug in which all the people involved develop their own jargon when talking about the drug, their own rituals for where and when to consume to drug and their own social mores for how to behave before, during and after use. A very risky economy is produced in which the players are paying money for the drug, and there is a complex distribution pattern that gets the drug from where it was produced to where it is consumed, and all the people involved all get paid along the way. If anyone in this chain is compromised by law enforcement, then the entire system is impacted and its economic gains are interrupted.

While learning about the economical and cultural ramifications of each drug was very interesting, the main thing I took away was the law of the international drug trade. When you deny a supplier a market, the supplier will find another market. If you deny a user a supplier, they will simply seek another supplier. In other words, the demand still exists whether or not the supplier exists. As long as the dealer knows there is demand somewhere, then all they have to do find those people who demand the drug. All that is necessary for a drug dealer to flourish is for the demand to be present.

Why is the demand present? What is it that people are looking for when they buy and use drugs? And why do we as a society think that having to provide a driver’s license at the pharmacy to buy a box of Sudafed will do anything to lessen the demand—which is what actually drives the drug trade?

This is the very idea of why it bothers me that I had to provide a driver’s license to buy Todd some Sudafed. If there’s someone out there who is hell-bent enough on producing and distributing meth—to keep up with the demand of their customers--then having to provide their driver’s license to buy the main ingredients will not stop them. They will simply find another way to get the ingredients back to the lab and keep up with production. There are trucks to be robbed, fake IDs to be gotten, or maybe by now there are Sudafed mules whose job is to go into the stores and get Sudafed. Limiting the quantities of Sudafed will only be a speed bump for the producers and dealers of the drug, and will only drive up the cost of the drug—because getting the ingredients to make it is now just a bit harder.

This policy—whether it’s a law or a store policy—though good intentioned does little to address why the demand for crystal meth exists in the first place.

Diatribe over.